Why alter the attentions of our little friction in the universe? Why change? Love. Not for family, friends, not for any ideal, country or even love of self; because the self is a violent sneeze, a brief yet explosive misting of mucus soon lost to time. Eloquent, I know. True change courts a love beyond our humanity, known only when we offer ourselves wholly to the unorderable bliss of the universe. Bring that love home, and your human connections can finally become what they need to be – your reality and guide to purpose.
Universal love, this ultimate connection, is experienced by our bodies as unimpeded energy flow – when we stop holding and fighting and trying to control the wild coursing motion of time and space through our physical selves. We story this love and God is real. Bring the story closer, deeper, into the private universe of your seething, sparkling brain. How far can we reach into love from this landscape?
After years of dedicated creative mindfulness meditation I was ready to risk the ultimate thought experiment. My greatest fear? Death (sooo original). What is the greatest death? The death of a star… And so I gave in, collected all my energies and released – knowing I might never come back. Because you can’t see death without risking (at the very least) everything you believe – not to be too dramatic or anything. And so, with every atom of my being, I became a supernova. Note: this thought experiment, mind you, came after years of playing in geological time and countless embarrassing moments of “I am the rock” (and the more advanced) “I am the tree” projections of my consciousness on my walk home from work. Because I’m cool like that.
Now back to the supernova. To my surprise, it was the most glorious full-being-gasm of my life!! (and I’m a multiple girl ~wink) If the french define an orgasm as “the little death,” this was, dear readers, the megaton – the big one. Instantaneously, every particle and energy blasted outwards in all directions, filling space and time with the spectacular essence of… me. I became abundance. And what was left of my humanity was swept swirling into the clouds from where I was standing. Because yes, I was standing, I may have a flexible brain but these knees will never lotus. Obviously, words can never describe this experience, and gawd I’ve tried. All I can say is that I burst out crying and felt for the very first time in my life that “everything was going to be ok.” And maybe that’s the best, most human, way to describe it.
Actually, I wasn’t just standing; I was folding laundry. A gal’s got to keep herself grounded somehow! And here’s the crux of my argument: from all I’ve read it would seem unlikely that anyone could touch enlightenment while folding laundry – except of course Martha Stewart (but apparently it didn’t stick) – I can only share my story. It’s all I am and all I have. Because I’m human and you’re human, and a side-effect of this condition is that we cannot sustain continuous universal bliss if we want to keep our little friction alive. So what are our options? How can we keep this connection alive in our relationships and day to day reality? How can our universal self give us the space to change? And more importantly, after tasting bliss, what do we wear?
Read the next post: Making a change? Connecting with your universal self – Part 2
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Making a change? The REAL reason to risk the void!
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Making a change? Connecting with your universal self – Part 1
Making a change? Connecting with your universal self – Part 2
Making a change? Finding your authentic self
12 thoughts on “Making a change? Connecting with your universal self – Part 1”
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you are amazing! I had such a moment years and years ago while writing on a portable typewriter by the edge of Lake Ontario in Kingston, when a storm blew up….that extraordinary moment of being seamlessly connected….it’s a moment that is ephemeral, elusive, temporal…and freeing…Cymbria, with your wit, humananess, and clarity of thought offer us the invitation to dream again…a million stars of gratitude….
Wow Lynn!! I’m imagining I’m with you on the edge of that lake, being swept up into the storm with only a flight of words to ground us… (because a portable typewriter has just the right amount of heft)
wow what a crazy experience! my god, what’s next after that indeed!
Intense, man… intense lol. But seriously, it was beyond spectacular. And just like a first kiss, you never forget your first supernova 😉 So excited you’re along for the ride!
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