Welcome to play! Invite a creative content creator into your child’s life and watch the magic happen! Who needs video games, anorexic dolls, and regimented craft kits when kids have so many stories ripe for exploration and invention. A creative content creator isn’t a babysitter or a simple craft coordinator; our specialized skill set opens imaginations and turns story into a personalized – ridiculously fun! – physical reality. Continue reading
Treat tonight’s date to a naughty trick with these devilish DIY bad girl panties. A sexy, full-on naked, first impression leads to a very spooky, downright scary surprise. Caution: may cause long term trauma when dealing with a first time face-to-panty explorer…
She lifts the hem of her angel costume and beckons him closer. In the dim light of the party host’s bedroom he can see she’s not wearing any underwear.
“Not a natural blonde then, eh?” He chuckles at his joke. He can’t believe his luck. It’s easy, too easy.
“Crawl to me, slowly,” she orders.
Dropping to his knees, he obeys. Closer, closer, his heart beating faster, faster, pounding to the tempo of the Halloween music booming below. Now his head is bowed at her white stilettos. He follows the curve of her bare, sweet smelling calf with his lips, his tongue. This is his first time. Anticipation is ringing in his ears. Now up her thighs, spread just wide enough to take his cheeks between and squeeze, gently, as he rises towards his prize.
But suddenly everything is wrong! Cold, so cold and horrifying! He’s face to face with a swarming mass of scorpions!! He cries out, falls back, traumatized down to very gut of his manhood.
“Holiday birth control at its finest,” she laughs, and walks over him back down to the party.
What you’ll need to make your own DIY Halloween panties:
1 flesh coloured thong (La Senza)
1 package creepy critters (Dollar Store or Walmart)
flesh coloured thread
Arrange plastic insects/scorpions/spiders into a… um… suggestively pubic simulation. Sew to secure in place. And because this subversive craft is all about ‘subtlety’, chose critters that match your natural… um… hair colour – cockroaches for blondes, scorpions for brunettes. Oh, and that green beetle fellow if you’re in the mood for a Brazilian rainforest surprise ~wink.
Note: This technique can also be used to DIY the most frightening Halloween underwear of all… Microsoft, Star Trek, and Noam Chompsky certified NERD PANTIES!! Although I think the scariest thing here is that I actually own all these pins.
We all know that pounding the pavement is the best way to land a job, but it also happens to be a great strategy for promoting your website and increasing blog traffic. Yes, I’m being literal here, absurdly, almost painfully, literal. These DIY blog advertising shoes were made for some serious pavement pounding.
Come on, admit it, blogging is inherently self-indulgent. Oh sure, we all say we’re sharing our unimpeachable wit and wisdom out of some altruistic impulse to inspire and serve. But let’s be honest, what other forum gives you open permission to post Calgary Stampede inspired bondage gear or a fully darted paper pencil skirt, or… even these shoes? Own it. Be your own best advertisement. Be proud to be a walking billboard for your precious blog creation. Wrap yourself, or at least your tootsies, in personal propaganda. Just do it.
We already cover ourselves in logos, why not wear your own? I bought these ‘blank canvas’ shoes (I know, I know, so apropos for this blog) at my neighbourhood Payless for under $20. Click here to view Payless’ online canvas shoe selection. Using a fine tip black Sharpie, I went, admittedly, a bit wild drawing my blog address and our darling mascot Mitch-the-insatiable-itch. Note: You could also use fabric pens/markers, which you can find at Michaels, along with 40 000 other products you never knew you’d ever need (and I do mean ‘need’).
Indulging one’s shoe fetish by wearing a couple dozen little penises on one’s feet is always going to lead to fun times – not to mention some very interesting conversations while riding public transit. But even if your blog lacks any reference, visual or otherwise, to genitalia, feel free to play up your theme and get creative with your imagery. Why stop at shoes? Hats, canvas totes, belts… drape yourself in personalized, attention getting advertising. Stop street traffic while increasing blog traffic! Ok, so maybe I’m getting a bit carried away, but to compete for clicks, views, and readers in our age of in-your-face promotional bombardment, it pays to think outside the box and try some on-your-foot blog advertising to get the word out. Heck, if the shoe fits…
And if you want to get your hands involved with promoting your blog and increasing your readership – the more body parts the better – you can click through to learn how to make an innovative DIY bookmark flip book. Sounds bizarre, sure, but we bloggers know that engaging (and broadening) an audience calls for every trick in the book (er… blog?).
I bring out the adult-size version of this catsuit inspired muumuu transformation to show my Blank Canvas Living Creative Counselling client. She’d been brave enough to strip off her Walmart muumuu to expose her addictions, and braver still to hand over the epically unflattering pink and orange synthetic protection in hope that I could show her a different kind of comfort.
Last session, she was enthusiastic in her adoption of the new language of addictions – glamours, insatiables, and be-all-end-alls – and ranked her own obsessions according to this novel nomenclature. We discussed how these words open new patterns of positive brain associations and allow more space for change. But now, faced with a different life dangling in front of her on a thin wire hanger, chest wraps (two long narrow strips of fabric for wrapping around the torso) pooling on the green carpet, she looks more than a little dubious.
“For goodness sakes, no! This is about transforming your perception of an object – in this case a protection – that you think you know, and taking that change out of the theoretical and into the physical world. This is about embracing a whole new definition of comfort. Rather than making yourself invisible by hiding behind your learned glamours and insatiables, we’re going right back to a genetically coded human glamour – swaddling! This DIY bodysuit can give you that close womb feeling of being held when you swaddle yourself with the chest bands. You can change the wrapping pattern to play with your body to let its secret curves surprise and sustain you (and your most intimate relationships) rather than layering on artificial distractions and escapes.”
“So let me get this straight,” she says, “dressing up like Comic-Con Stripper Barbie is going to help me stop drinking and waiting for calls from bad men?”
“This is to get you back in touch with your body and start opening up more creative avenues of perception. The real hard-core brain work comes later. Funny you should mention Barbie clothes, though. I actually thought the ultimate sex kitten would be good place to practice. And don’t worry about your body not looking like Barbie’s, or Adrianne Curry at comic-con. But I can promise you that you’ll be amazed at how your body will respond when you start to get your glamours in gear. So do you want to play?” I put down the hanger and pull two dolls out of the canvas bag behind my chair.
She takes the brunette with all the grim, ceremonious reluctance of a subpoena. But before long her and I are laughing and joking as we compete for who can come up with the most risqué-chic chest wrap variation.
“You know what,” she confesses with pink cheeks and a naughty grin, “this is actually really fun.”
Bring home the Wild West with this easy to make two-part DIY belt that converts into a full range of bondage gear: handcuffs, legcuffs, hogtie cuffs, gag, and collar. Having this naughty, ever so stylish, secret bound round your waist will let you schedule your own rodeo events whenever, and wherever, your fantasies take you. Why pay for admission to the Calgary Stampede when all the best rides are just a hogtie away? Let the cowboys keep their rope for tying up cattle and lassoing unruly cowgirls. Animals like you and I know that Western bondage is best played with furry cuffs made from nylon webbing.
Supplies for this easy artistic bondage DIY project:
1/2 m fabric (Walmart short pile cow print faux fur shown)
1 1/2 m 25mm (1″) brown nylon webbing
2 black nylon side release buckles (25mm)
2 metal rings (1 1/2″ diameter)
safety pins/lighter/thread/scissors/sewing machine (or hand sew)
1) Cut nylon webbing into 4 equal pieces and adjust lengths with safety pins to fit desired submissive’s wrists and ankles. See pic of how cuffs will work and measure accordingly. Make sure you leave enough excess webbing for belt (when both cuffs are buckled to each other end to end).
3) Cut 4 rectangles of fabric – 4 inches wide with lengths determined by webbing between buckle and ring + 1/2inch hem allowance on either side. Hem width edges, fold over, and sew wrong sides together along lengths. Turn right side out and slide over buckles to cover webbing.
4) Practice changing BDSM sex toy modes according to the illustrations and pictures in this post. Just like training for any rodeo or bondage technique, practice makes perfect!
-If you want to switch domination and submission roles, or go out to find new limbs to bind, you can use the pictured figure eight cuff variation to accommodate an infinite variety of wrist and ankle sizes in these homemade furry handcuffs and legcuffs.
-For the latter variation, and belt configuration, fabric tube can be pulled over buckles for style and comfort.
-Fabric tube can be rolled in over itself if bunching occurs in belt configuration.
We all want to drive more traffic to our sites, but we need to get creative when “come read my blog” is the internet equivalent of a stranger in line at Starbucks flipping open his wallet to show you pictures of his cat. This new flip book method is a way to engage people through animation, individual choice, and a take home object with real-world use to anyone who loves the smell and feel of books too much to fully convert to their eReaders.
How to promote your blog with a bookmark flip book:
“Check this out,” you say, leaning close to your target like you’re letting him/her in on a special secret – which of course you are. Holding your stack of bookmarks firmly near the midpoint, use your thumb to quickly flip through your images (each varied slightly), thus creating a lively animation of your blog’s theme. In the sample shown above I’ve used Blank Canvas Living’s mascot: Mitch the insatiable human itch. Lastly, invite your target to choose his/her favorite bookmark to take home.
How to make your own DIY blog bookmark flip book:
Copy/paste your website address and tagline down the left margin of any word processing (or graphics/draw) program, leaving suitable space between. Choose a simple, repeatable image that captures the theme of your blog. Note: the genitalia shown is optional, although I do think it adds a certain je ne sais quoi to any invitation. Copy/paste your graphic down the opposite margin, remembering to vary each one. You can also use repeating sets to save yourself some time/effort. Note: I’ve hand drawn the samples above, because an hour spent drawing a few dozen penises is almost as fun as an hour spent… Print out your bookmarks on card stock and cut/X-acto them apart. Flip!
“Hooters girls are going to be there!” heralded my Viking in his sales pitch for a friend’s upcoming UFC party. Hooters girls, eh? As if watching the gnarly, bloody mayhem of Ultimate Fighting Championship wasn’t enticing enough… add giant breasted hot chicks and we’ve got a recipe for severe testosterone overload. Now, I’m not without my attributes, but wit, charm, and blonde hair can only take a gal so far when the surroundings are 100% eye candy. Solution? Parlaying some of said wit and charm into an eye grabbing, chest focused… craft project!! Because nothing’s sexier than a gal who can ‘bead’ down the competition.
DIY UFC themed necklace instructions:
Components modeled by a very manly, and surprisingly willing, neighbourhood construction worker – working on, yes, those are train tracks.
2 mini wrestler action figures ($10 for duo at Walmart)
2 lengths of 22 gauge wire (length of your leg) (Dollar Store)
1 package white/grey/black pony beads (Dollar Store)
1-Dismember wrestler action figures. Trim joints and scrape off unwanted paint.
2-Beginning at center point (see legs in detail pic), wrap both strands of wire around 1st body part. Secure by twisting wires together (three twists each time – to resemble UFC chain link fence around ring)
3-Working outwards from center, alternate beads as shown in detail pic. Thread each bead onto one strand (leaving other wire on outside of bead), then twist wires (three times) to secure.
4-Once all body parts and central chest area beading is complete, bend to form desired shape (see detail pic). Continue beading on either side until desired length.
Note: Eye protection is heavily recommended for this DIY necklace project!! I admit, dear readers, there was a moment halfway through this bizarre beading adventure when I had to ask myself: “Is this awesome or… just weird?” In my defense, I did promise you I’d do something radical over the weekend…
Secret freedoms… deepest passions… strappy high heels… The wording of my first official Blank Canvas Living assignment comes loaded with clues to its criteria.
In order to integrate sketching into her hectic lifestyle, the client would need a way to carry a sketchbook discreetly, protect its pages, and be inspired to let go of her inhibitions and excuses every time she sits down to draw.
The nature of this project, with its almost total creative freedom, is intoxicating. My mind races with ideas. This is the same thrill I felt designing my seismic skirt after burning those horrible ugly pants up on the roof. I’ve craved this level of creative engagement for so long, and I need to prove with this assignment that I can be part of Blank Canvas Living as more than just a tourist.
One idea dominates all the others – a two part sadomasochistic hood and handcuffs protective tote. Is a bondage sex theme too much? Too extreme? I don’t know the client’s history, but those strappy high heeled shoes keep leading me straight back to BDSM. What better way to tempt the client into artistic expression than ‘artistic bondage’? I submit to the process, and get down to work…
1-Cut calf of sacrificial black leggings to length of sketchbook + 1” (depending on thickness of book)
2-Sew cut end closed to make a pouch
1-Stretch 3/4” wide elastic around sketchbook to desired tension – cut two of these lengths and stitch ends together to form ‘cuffs’
2-Cut third length (the ‘chain’) with ¾” extra on both ends to fold around ‘cuff’ loops.
3-Sew ‘cuffs’ onto their ‘chain’
Slip the hood over the sketchbook, then slide on the cuffs, leaving enough slack in the ‘chain’ to create a handle. The handcuffs can be used alone (as shown), and will hold pens/pencils securely under the ‘chain’.
I tie my sweater around my long johns’ waist for modesty’s sake, and get down to business, armed with a tape measure from the 10th floor (can’t wait until I’m allowed behind the frosted glass!) and my geophysical company’s office supplies. Turns out paper – a material I thought I knew so well – has a grain, a weft that must be respected for it to cooperate with the human form. I coax the curves with a staggered layering of scotch tape (packing tape proves too tacky and final). Cutting the pattern on the diagonal creates the chevron effect, and the fit is tailored with four darts on the front and ten ½” darts on the back – ending at different points to create a lifting effect that perfectly cups my….. Finally, to stabilize the shape of the side seams, I bend and tape in two thin pieces of metal I find digging through old printer/computer parts in our infamous ‘back room’.
Suddenly a revelation hits me; I’m having fun. But more than that, I’m entirely sated by my present, fully engaged in an interactive learning with the material and task at hand. My senses guide me through fluid problem solving with real time risks and rewards. Is this what she wanted me to know? Is this ‘blank canvas living’?
When I ring the buzzer on the 10th floor to return the tape measure, my new friend answers the frosted door herself. I do a few poses and show her my sketches, along with the results of my (trying to be super sexy in long johns, wool socks, and a paper skirt) self-timer, guerilla-style, file room photoshoot.
Her fluorescent pink lips glow even brighter when she laughs. “I had a feeling you were going to surprise me…” she says. “Let’s make an appointment for you to come back and take a tour. You know, I’ve been looking for someone like you for a long time.”